How to Use Humor to Attract Women

Women love fun, and men with a sense of humor come across to them as charming and socially intelligent. And although a man may not always be physically attractive, having a sense of humor gives a huge boost of attractiveness in a woman’s perception of his overall image.

In conversation, most guys end up boring women. They don’t know how to carry a conversation with a woman, or talk in a way that attracts her. Women are turned off by guys who are boring, so you need to know how to keep the conversation fun. A woman you’re talking to will quickly lose interest if you do nothing but pepper her with “interview-style” questions, or if you talk to her about mundane topics like the weather.

Also, women are social creatures. They are sensitive to something called Social Intelligence, which has to do with an awareness of what is socially acceptable or not. A socially inept man can easily display his lack of social intelligence by making an inappropriate comment, telling jokes that no one finds funny, or missing the “cues” she is sending. Needless to say, an obvious lack of social intelligence quickly kills a woman’s attraction toward you and gets you quickly dismissed. So then, what kind of humor should you bring to a conversation with a woman

Women expect a man to lead a conversation, and to do so in a fun, sexy and flirty way. They want you to be able to make them laugh, enjoy themselves and feel physically safe and emotionally secure around you. A sense of humor livens up the mood and also makes everyone around you more at ease. You can eliminate a huge amount of resistance in a woman, if there ever was any, and instead make her a lot more receptive to you.

So that’s the key to talking to women: Do so in a kind of fun, playful, flirtatious and sexy way. Have a conversation with her in a way that makes her feel so much fun and enjoyment around you. Bring out her playful side. And since women are attracted to topics that bring out an emotional response in them, inject emotional words into your conversation when describing something. Don’t just say something was fun; instead say, “my heart was beating with excitement.”

There are a few other things to watch out for when engaging in conversation with a woman:

Remember to be Fun, not Funny. Women will be attracted to you when you allow them to have fun, instead of you trying to be funny. Don’t concentrate on having the funniest jokes. Concentrate instead on showing them the most enjoyment, fun and excitement.

If ever you crack a joke, make it tasteful and light, and pay special attention not to say anything which may offend. Avoid comments like: “Are you stupid or something Just kidding.” Or: “Come over here bulimic. Just kidding, you look good.” Avoid sarcasm as these are just insults in disguise and reflect insecurity and lack of confidence. Trying to get a laugh at someone else’s expense brands you as lacking in confidence, class, and social intelligence. Simply said, you’ll look like a jerk.

To be successful with jokes, start with poking fun at yourself. If you notice that you forgot to shave, then you can say something like: “I need to shave. I have to make the transition from ape to human again.” This will bring about a healthy laugh, at the same time projecting confidence and a healthy acceptance of yourself. You’ll reveal a fun side that does not take yourself too seriously. And if you are not naturally spontaneous with jokes, memorize a few, and keep them in your back-pocket for use when the occasion arises. This can help you make up for your lack of spontaneous creativity.

Engage in playful teasing. It is one of the easiest ways to bring a conversation up to a fun and flirty level. To do this, think back to when you were in your 4th grade playground, as long as you were playful and not mean. What worked on the playground is incredibly effective in dating women.

Use fun and flirty conversation “games”. Women enjoy games that are fun and flirtatious. They can be anything like “truth or dare”, or the “5 questions game”. In the process, you talk to a woman in a way that brings out her sexual side and that leads to sexual attraction. Don’t be scared of talking about things on a more intimate level. It doesn’t mean you talk about sex, but rather about personal and intimate topics when they do come up. These sorts of topics create rapport and have women start feeling a connection with you.

However, you might want to avoid sensitive issues like race, religion, and politics, until you get to know her well enough. Some people have deeply embedded opinions and beliefs which can make them defensive or even aggressive toward a perceived slight on their belief system.

Do not make rough physical contact such as pushing, grabbing, slapping, hitting, shoving, or wrestling when joking with a woman. This can be perceived as rude, boorish, creepy or downright threatening. Remember, women want to feel physically safe and emotionally secure around you. At the very least, you don’t want to give the wrong impression; at worst, you don’t want to be accused of assault.

A last note: Women love to laugh and have fun. If you tend to be a serious person and don’t feel comfortable with being funny with women, don’t despair. Take her to a funny movie instead, and let the actors do the job. Creating a fun and enjoyable encounter does not require the skills of a comedian. What you don’t want to do is force yourself to act or behave in a way that is not natural to you. I once had a co-worker who was a very serious person by nature, but who would force himself to try to be funny. He simply ended up appearing socially inept and emotionally insecure, and women are quite turned off by that.

Which is not to say of course, that a joke may not be appropriate sometimes. Occasionally, an awkward silence between the two of you can be a good time to crack a well placed, well-timed joke to liven up the mood. What’s important is to have a healthy sense of humor and the ability to create a fun and enjoyable encounter for attracting women, making them enjoy your company and wanting to spend time with you.

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